My kid asked me the big question yesterday. "Do you guys have any money saved for my college?" I could say we do, but I still might use the money for a big fucking motorcycle to tear ass around on so it's not a sure thing. I considered just saying no, but I'm always imparting wisdom to this one, including never to lie to me. Hah!
"No, you're not going to college. You'll be lucky if there's even food and air by the time you're old enough for college."We were on our way into the bowling alley where he had bowling business so we left it there. He smashed a bunch of wooden pins around with his friends, who will be lucky if they get to go to prison, never mind college, and we took off.
He's smart, this one. He can make me happy or piss me off practically effortlessly. I've warned him about me, but he doesn't believe it. "I'm a fairly dangerous man," I tell him. "You're an old bald fat guy," he tells me. He doesn't know that old fat bald guys can be dangerous because he's so young."I want to go to college and I'll work my way through if I have to.Can I stay with you and Mom while I'm in college?" " I guess so, yeah, that'll be alright. I want to meet all your girlfriends though, keep you out of any problems. OK?"
"No, stay away from my friends. They don't like you. How much have you guys saved up so far?" Smart kid, just like his old man. Probably, he'll steal billions and wreck economies for a living and get me a cabana on the beach at Virgin Gorda and a Vincent Black Shadow. I just want him to be happy, like any good father would.
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